Last week we talked about finding the “perfect” spouse. Believe it or not, finding the “perfect” spouse starts with being the kind of spouse you desire. This week, we’ll focus on looking inward.

1. Am I Becoming the Person God Wants Me to Be?

We should always strive to become more Christlike -- not a “Christian” in name only, but a true follower of Jesus. Whether you are new in the faith or have been following Christ for years, you should always seek to learn more about our Lord and grow in your love for him. Submit to the Lordship of Jesus Christ in your life, and let him make you into the person He wants you to be, for His glory. (Philippians 1:6)

2. Am I Able to Love and Lead God’s Way? (Men)

Husbands are commanded to love their wives “as Christ loved the church” (Ephesians 5:25-28) -- sacrificially and unselfishly. The only way to do this is through the power of the Holy Spirit living in us. The Bible calls husbands to “love their wives as their own bodies” because “He who loves his wife loves himself.” (Ephesians 5:28) The Bible says “no one ever hated their own body,but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the Church.” (Ephesians 5:29)

3. Am I Able to Submit and respect? (Women)

All of us, men and women, are to submit to each other (Ephesians 5:21), and ultimately to God. God specifically calls wives to submit to husbands (Ephesians 5:22), and respect them (Ephesians 5:33). God calls husbands to lead. The Bible says “the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church” (Ephesians 5:23). That means, as a wife, you must “submit yourself to your own husbands as you do to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). Are you willing to submit to your future husband and respect him as God has called you to? This means you must trust the leadership that God has given your husband--even if you don’t always agree. Encourage him, pray for him, and stand by him as a godly wife.